Have been fortunate in the sense that I have lived in different parts of the country, and have travelled extensively. The greatest advantage of travelling and staying in different Indian cities is that you come in contact with people from all walks of life. Mumbai has been a completely different experience altogether. We moved into this so called up-market housing society in a not so upmarket area (Kandivali West). Believe me I have had the strangest experiences ever! Nothing can beat the kind of regressive and sad mindset that we have encountered here. We of course have the option to leave and move into a different housing complex, but that would mean just one thing - RUNNING AWAY!!!
For the moment we have chosen to give it another chance, at least for another year!. The population in the society is predominantly #Marwari and #Gujarati. You'll hardly come across a #Marathi family. Most outsiders or people like me who come to Mumbai for the first time, come with a certain notion in mind. We assume we'll meet simple and decent Marathi people. After all this is their land, so they should ideally be the dominant community. Hmmm..apparently the likes of me are wrong..North Indians infest the city in epidemic proportions. The reason why I say that Marathis are sweet and quiet people, because my husband has spent a huge part of his life growing up with Marathis in and around Nagpur. The people I have come in contact with, regardless of their financial status are hardworking, disciplined, and simple. On the other hand, though I have stayed in Kolkata for three years, my interaction with Marwari's was limited. Never really mixed with anyone from the community. As far as Gujju's are concerned, I have had, again very limited contact with the community. I visited my sister in Ahmedabad just once during her IIM days, so we kind of met very nice and cultured people, and most of them were outsiders. So I never really had a strong opinion about either of the communities.
After all this is a sovereign, socialist, secular,democratic republic. Theoretically, according to our Constitution, all Indians have the right to live in any part of the country, move freely from one part of the country to another, etc. etc. of course all these rights come with a set of duties that each citizen must perform.
But the ones settled in Mumbai for a generation or two think otherwise. They believe in hate mongering and are fairly aggressive, the only perceptible difference in between them and North Indians is they can abuse in ENGLISH! That apparently lends sophistication notwithstanding their educational or financial status.
The sad part is most of us are like that. We have a certain set of rules for others and conveniently change them when it comes to ourselves.
A true life example:
The moment we moved into the campus, some lady rang our bell, I was on the phone with my husband, opened the door and smiled; before I could react she started hurling abuses, "people like you, come and spoil our society, bloody tenants!, anyone can earn money these days! Why have you kept this carton out side the door? How dare you bring your village culture here...bloody outsiders!" This tirade went on for a while, I was stumped! In the meanwhile another one came out of her flat, gave me the once over, and told the other one, "now we'll have to out up with this trash!" I waited for them to stop! And I asked her if she could coherently explain, what her problem was? She declared that we are not allowed to keep shoe racks outside the door. So I asked her why did the society not put up a notice to the effect? Who gave her the right to abuse me? And how dare she speak about my financial status?
We resolved the issue and gave her an introduction of my family background. Post which she was apologetic. Both the families are outsiders who've settled in Bombay. One a Malayali family and the other Punjabi!!. The Punjabi family incidentally owes its fortune to a "clothing store!" Ouch!!! Considering the fact that I come from a family of several generations of highly literate Bengalis, you can imagine the cultural shock!!!
We have decided to stay on inspite a spate of similar "hate" incidents. Our daughter is a 9 year old and has faced abusive old men; and unfriendly kids who don't want to play with her. Interestingly she is a Mathematics Olympiad Gold Medalist, And consistently gets full marks in most of the subjects. At school teachers only speak well off her, so it came as a shock o us when she walked home one day and declared she'll never go down to play. That we are tenants also impacts how children react to her. Most of them have clear instructions from their parents not to mix with her. No birthday party invites and no participating in community feasts. We have infact written to the Residents Welfare Association, with our flat owner in sync. Believe it or not, the association did not deem fit to respond to our emails. So much for basic courtesy! Not a single office member or the manager had the decency to come and speak with us or try to resolve issues at hand.
Unofficially, a few women informed me that tenants are looked upon askance.They are trouble and have to be kept in check! Interestingly we have a flat off our own in Bangalore, which we have rented out to a nuclear family.
Mumbai, I feel is a tad bit overrated!
For the moment we have chosen to give it another chance, at least for another year!. The population in the society is predominantly #Marwari and #Gujarati. You'll hardly come across a #Marathi family. Most outsiders or people like me who come to Mumbai for the first time, come with a certain notion in mind. We assume we'll meet simple and decent Marathi people. After all this is their land, so they should ideally be the dominant community. Hmmm..apparently the likes of me are wrong..North Indians infest the city in epidemic proportions. The reason why I say that Marathis are sweet and quiet people, because my husband has spent a huge part of his life growing up with Marathis in and around Nagpur. The people I have come in contact with, regardless of their financial status are hardworking, disciplined, and simple. On the other hand, though I have stayed in Kolkata for three years, my interaction with Marwari's was limited. Never really mixed with anyone from the community. As far as Gujju's are concerned, I have had, again very limited contact with the community. I visited my sister in Ahmedabad just once during her IIM days, so we kind of met very nice and cultured people, and most of them were outsiders. So I never really had a strong opinion about either of the communities.
After all this is a sovereign, socialist, secular,democratic republic. Theoretically, according to our Constitution, all Indians have the right to live in any part of the country, move freely from one part of the country to another, etc. etc. of course all these rights come with a set of duties that each citizen must perform.
But the ones settled in Mumbai for a generation or two think otherwise. They believe in hate mongering and are fairly aggressive, the only perceptible difference in between them and North Indians is they can abuse in ENGLISH! That apparently lends sophistication notwithstanding their educational or financial status.
The sad part is most of us are like that. We have a certain set of rules for others and conveniently change them when it comes to ourselves.
A true life example:
The moment we moved into the campus, some lady rang our bell, I was on the phone with my husband, opened the door and smiled; before I could react she started hurling abuses, "people like you, come and spoil our society, bloody tenants!, anyone can earn money these days! Why have you kept this carton out side the door? How dare you bring your village culture here...bloody outsiders!" This tirade went on for a while, I was stumped! In the meanwhile another one came out of her flat, gave me the once over, and told the other one, "now we'll have to out up with this trash!" I waited for them to stop! And I asked her if she could coherently explain, what her problem was? She declared that we are not allowed to keep shoe racks outside the door. So I asked her why did the society not put up a notice to the effect? Who gave her the right to abuse me? And how dare she speak about my financial status?
We resolved the issue and gave her an introduction of my family background. Post which she was apologetic. Both the families are outsiders who've settled in Bombay. One a Malayali family and the other Punjabi!!. The Punjabi family incidentally owes its fortune to a "clothing store!" Ouch!!! Considering the fact that I come from a family of several generations of highly literate Bengalis, you can imagine the cultural shock!!!
We have decided to stay on inspite a spate of similar "hate" incidents. Our daughter is a 9 year old and has faced abusive old men; and unfriendly kids who don't want to play with her. Interestingly she is a Mathematics Olympiad Gold Medalist, And consistently gets full marks in most of the subjects. At school teachers only speak well off her, so it came as a shock o us when she walked home one day and declared she'll never go down to play. That we are tenants also impacts how children react to her. Most of them have clear instructions from their parents not to mix with her. No birthday party invites and no participating in community feasts. We have infact written to the Residents Welfare Association, with our flat owner in sync. Believe it or not, the association did not deem fit to respond to our emails. So much for basic courtesy! Not a single office member or the manager had the decency to come and speak with us or try to resolve issues at hand.
Unofficially, a few women informed me that tenants are looked upon askance.They are trouble and have to be kept in check! Interestingly we have a flat off our own in Bangalore, which we have rented out to a nuclear family.
Mumbai, I feel is a tad bit overrated!
